July 24, 1952- Gus Van Sant‘s own words for Matt Dillon as Bob in Drugstore Cowboy:
“Fate sucks. I swear. “
In spring 1989, if I had been somewhat clairvoyant while on the set of the film Drugstore Cowboy, I would have realized that in the 21st century I would be living in Portland, Oregon, in fact, in a house just a mile from where we were filming. I most likely would have dismissed the entire notion as too much caffeine & candy from crafts services. I loved living in Seattle for a decade, I had the best agent in town & would never have dreamed of leaving.
I had been fortunate enough to have found acting work on TV series, & a whole lot of commercials & voice-overs, but the Gus Van Sant project was my first role feature film. I was thrilled to be working with the talented director of Mala Noche, a film I really admired & that had received an enthusiastic reception at The Seattle Film Festival in 1985. I was working in a feature film! My scenes were with dreamy Matt Dillon!
I have now done 12 films, but this one will always be something special. The very soft spoken Van Sant creates an extremely creative atmosphere for working. Many of the actors that have done films with Van Sant have remarked on how great he is to work with & how conducive to creativity the conditions are on the set of his films. He was not big on rehearsing, but he would ask for something completely different out of each take. Dillon (who I have worked with twice) was such a nice gentleman. He would stay & read his lines back to me for our reverse shots. Dillon was a real “regular” guy. He would eat lunch, sitting at a big long table, with the rest of the cast, crew & grips & he spent very little time in his trailer. The rest of the cast were fun & friendly: Kelly Lynch, James LeGros, Anthony George Catalano & Heather Graham. I did not get to meet fellow cast-member William S. Burroughs, my only regret from this experience.
I was invited to the premiere of Drugstore Cowboy, but did not attend because I was performing in a play at the time & the event was in Berlin. The film went on to receive rave reviews. It won 1990 Independent Spirit Awards for Best Screenplay for Van Sant & Daniel Yost, plus Best Cinematography, Best Actor for Dillon, & Best Supporting Actor for Max Perlich. It won Best Screenplay awards from the LA Film Critics Association, the National Society Of Film Critics & the NY Film Critics Circle, & Best Film at the Berlin International Film Festival. At the film’s Seattle premiere, The Husband turned to me half-way through the viewing & stated:
“Oh. My. God. Stephen, you are in a really GOOD movie!”
Van Sant’s other films have ranged from Oscar winning studio fare: Good Will Hunting (1997) & Finding Forrester (2000) to very experimental: Gerry (2002) & Last Days (2005); Indies: Elephant (2003) & Paranoid Park (2007); noble, brave & baffling experiments: the shot by shot re-make of Psycho (1998) & Even Cowgirls Get The Blues (1993). He has directed 4 films that I love a bunch & which I award an A on The Steve Report Card: Drugstore Cowboy (of course), My Own Private Idaho (1991) To Die For (1995), & Milk (2008).
In 2002, shortly after relocating to Portland after 20 years in Seattle, I was standing with some dear former neighbors from Seattle on a street in the Portland’s Peal District. My friend Susan uttered: “Oh my God, look! That is Gus Van Sant!” The Husband replied: “Yeah, he lives in this neighborhood. Stephen knows him”. Our little group mumbled some: “yeah, sure & uh-huhs”. As Van Sant walked past us, he looked up, & said in his singular soft manner:
“Hello… there… Stephen. I haven’t seen you in a while… strange… your head looks bigger…”
& then he went on his way. My friends looked baffled & everyone wanted to know what he meant. I had no idea (what could he have meant?), but I told them that it was an industry term, that good screen actors had heads that were proportionately too large for their bodies. It was my Gus Van Sant moment.
Van Sant is a Portland resident. Besides directing & writing films of all kinds, he is an author, musician, occasional actor, photographer & painter of considerable skill. He has always been openly gay. Portland is quite the town. Other queer artists who live here include: filmmaker Todd Haynes, k.d.lang, writer Chuck Palahniuk, Courtney Love, musician Logan Lynn, Author Tom Spanbauer & Carrie Brownstein. But, Van Sant is our Andy Warhol.
A few years later, I again accidentally met up with Van Sant on a Portland sidewalk. I was surprised that he would remember me by name, but he called out to me. He is not much for idle chatter, but trying to act nonchalant, I did ask what project he was working on & he did inquire as to my well-being. When he discovered that I resided in Portland, he emphatically stated that he wished that I had read for his film Elephant, that there had been a role that I would have been particularly well-suited. I shrugged & said that my new Portland agent had neglected to sent me out for the audition. Van Sant:
“That makes me sad, Stephen. I thought of you as I was writing that role. You would have brought a lot to the part. I wish we had known you were in town. Darn.”
I left the twice Oscar nominated director on the sidewalk, walked straight to the agent’s office, yelled at her while I was in tears, quit the agency, & walked away from show business.
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