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Watch! This Sports Team the San Francisco Giants Parodies Full House!

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The San Francisco Giants released a promo video for a Full House themed night on September 30th called “Full Clubhouse Night.” This is the night they play the Los Angeles Dodgers, their biggest rival. The video features Dave Coulier, who played Joey Gladstone on Full House (AND allegedly the inspiration for Alanis Morrisette‘s “You Oughta Know,” but that’s neither here nor there) and a lot of other really hot baseball type guys.

The post Watch! This Sports Team the San Francisco Giants Parodies Full House! appeared first on World of Wonder.


Who Are America’s Most Disliked Celebrities? Hint: One’s a Donut Licker, and the Other Drugs and Rapes Women

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The Q ratings are out! The biannually collected Q Scores are best known as a popularity rating — how well-liked, for example, a certain celebrity is among Americans — but also as a measure of their “negative” ratings, or how unpopular they are.

THR has a handy roundup of the stars whose disapproval ratings jumped the most in the past two years. No surprise, Bill Cosby comes out on top of the list, with Ariana Grande at No. 2. One of them has been accused of dozens of sexual assaults stretching back decades; the other is a young woman who once licked doughnuts and said she hated America. (Dr. Oz, Robin Thicke, and Adrian Peterson rounded out the top five.) Grande saw a 26-point bump in her disapproval rating, while Cosby’s jumped 43 points — about twice as much. Neither Cosby nor Grande’s overall disapproval ratings came close to those of Kim Kardashian (71 points) or Justin Bieber (63 points), though.

In Kim’s case, that’s not necessarily a bad thing because that’s how she markets herself – and the number, while negative, is actually a positive marker on the scale of success because it’s a “love to hate” scenario, where the overall negativity is really just a sign of popularity. Or something.

But Justin is just fucked. People REALLY hate him.

The post Who Are America’s Most Disliked Celebrities? Hint: One’s a Donut Licker, and the Other Drugs and Rapes Women appeared first on World of Wonder.

Mike Diamond’s ‘What’s Your Problem?': Mike Tackles Issues of Nerves and Finances!

Cute Boy Knits Even Cuter Food Hats!

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Supercute crocheted food hats from ChillyPhilly after the jump.

Phil Ferguson started making his hats after moving from Perth to Melbourne, Australia. According to BuzzFeed Life, he thought putting his work on Instagram would help him meet more people and, “After a few weeks I found it was a great way to channel my energy into making things people were liking!” He learned how to knit and crochet by watching tutorials on YouTube.

His favorite?

It “always changes, especially every time I make a new one! Right now, it’s either my bacon and eggs or my pizza! Though the burger always has a place in my heart.”

Does he wear these amazing headpieces in public?

“The more people ask, the more I think I should be! Currently they all just sit around my room and get worn around the house every now and again. It’s more of a case of not wanting them to get destroyed by going outside or having other people wear them!”

Follow Phil on Instagram or Facebook

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The post Cute Boy Knits Even Cuter Food Hats! appeared first on World of Wonder.

Kim Kardashian Has A Few Words on Gun Control Via Passionate Twitter Rant

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After Mama Kim Kardashian posted a pregnant selfie earlier in the week in order to dispel rumors of not actually being pregnant, she’s making bigger waves today on social media with a passionate Twitter rant proclaiming her stance on gun control laws.

Kim’s series of tweets began with asking her 34 million followers if they’ve heard the story about David Conley, who allegedly killed his ex-girlfriend, Valerie Jackson, her husband, and her six children in Houston, Texas. Conley is accused of shooting all eight victims one by one in the back of the head, and it was reported by Houston local news that the gun and ammunition he used were bought online.

She then continued by sending her prayers to the family of the victims.

Then, 2 Broke Girls star and Wowlebrity Kat Dennings replied to Kim:

Kim has recently taken to Twitter to use her far-reaching social media platform to call attention to other social issues, like when she tweeted her feelings on gun control following the tragic shooting in Newtown, Connecticut. And just last month, she used her voice to call attention to Sandra Bland’s death as well.

The post Kim Kardashian Has A Few Words on Gun Control Via Passionate Twitter Rant appeared first on World of Wonder.

Drool Over World of Wonder’s Weekly Island Report

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If you’ve been watching Island Hunters on HGTV, then YOU KNOW the jaw-droppingly sumptuous private islands that are out there on the market. Every week on our Island Report, we’re bringing you a hot new property you DIDN’T see on the show. Check out this unique place: Spitbank Fort, in England! Be sure to check out two BRAND NEW episodes of Island Hunters this Sunday 8/15 beginning at 10pm PST / 9 CT!

Via Private Islands Online:

Spitbank Fort is a private island in the middle of the Solent, off Portsmouth, England. This unusual and historic sea fortress has been transformed following a mult-million pound refurbishment into a luxury private island retreat.

The Fort boasts eight luxuriously furnished bedroom suites, three bars including a Laurent-Perrier Champagne Bar, three restaurant areas, rooftop hot pool, firepit and sauna.

Spitbank Fort is the most exclusive venue on the south coast, and is its own private island for hire, available for exclusive use, special events, private parties, wedding receptions, music videos and corporate hire. There are few venues in the world that can offer the privacy and exclusivity of Spitbank Fort.

With accommodation for 18 and function space for up to 60 people, this is the unique venue that you have been searching for that will quite simply blow all others out of the water.

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The post Drool Over World of Wonder’s Weekly Island Report appeared first on World of Wonder.

The Heart-Stopping Glamour of Donald & Ivana Trump in the 1980s

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Sure, he was a “short-fingered vulgarian” with weird hair even back then, but there was something compelling about Donald Trump in the 1980s, when he burst onto the New York social scene with his über-blonde glamazon wife, Ivana. She was brassy and shiny and bejeweled and bespangled and and painted and moussed within an inch of her life – but isn’t that what the decade was all about? We loved her for it. Just look at the two of them in these pictures. I mean REALLY. Did anyone have more fun in the ’80s than these two? Even now, I can’t help but feel THIS IS WHAT GLAMOUR IS ALL ABOUT. Big hair. Big ball gowns. Big jewels. It still excites me. And, oh!, just imagine if these two stayed together and we had IVANA TRUMP AS OUR FIRST LADY? I’m gasping even as I write the words.

On a parenthetical note: Life before teeth whiteners, though, amiright? Whooooooeeee. It was a DIFFERENT WORLD, I’ll tell you what.

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PKT4832-354263 DONALD TRUMP BUSINESSMAN American real estate tycoon Donald Trump pictured with wife Ivana. Having witnessed the improbable sight of his close associate Mike Tyson being flattened in Tokyo last Sunday morning, billionaire Donald Trump must have thought he had had his week full of shocks. Buthe hadn't. Within hours a phone call, to his private jet returning to New York, brought news of another improbable knock-out. THis time the victims were himself and his carefully laid plans for a quiet separation from his Czech born wife Ivana. For once the master publicist was on his back in public as an inspired leak from his wife's legal camp, to New York Daily News columnist Liz Smith, unleashed a conflagration that has burned ever since. Donald Trump is embroiled in Trump Vs. Trump with 1.7 billion dollars at stake. No sooner has Donald Trump departed for Tokyo, having asked for a separation, than Ivana - The Terrible as she is now being called - struck with deadly ferocity.

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BUSINESSMAN
American real estate tycoon Donald Trump pictured with wife Ivana.
Having witnessed the improbable sight of his close associate Mike Tyson being flattened in Tokyo last Sunday morning, billionaire Donald Trump must have thought he had had his week full of shocks.
Buthe hadn’t. Within hours a phone call, to his private jet returning to New York, brought news of another improbable knock-out.
THis time the victims were himself and his carefully laid plans for a quiet separation from his Czech born wife Ivana.
For once the master publicist was on his back in public as an inspired leak from his wife’s legal camp, to New York Daily News columnist Liz Smith, unleashed a conflagration that has burned ever since.
Donald Trump is embroiled in Trump Vs. Trump with 1.7 billion dollars at stake.
No sooner has Donald Trump departed for Tokyo, having asked for a separation, than Ivana – The Terrible as she is now being called – struck with deadly ferocity.

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The post The Heart-Stopping Glamour of Donald & Ivana Trump in the 1980s appeared first on World of Wonder.

#BornThisDay: The Wizard Of Oz

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August 15, 1939–  The Wizard Of Oz premiered at Grauman’s Chinese Theater, a cinematic event that changed many lives & altered pop culture forever.

Little Stevie Rutledge:

 “Mommy, Mommy…please let me stay up & watch The Wizard Of Oz, please, please! I promise to be good!” 

From 1956 to 1998 The Wizard Of Oz was an annual TV tradition at my house & all over the USA. Because of these broadcasts, it has become one of the most famous films ever made. The Library Of Congress names The Wizard Of Oz as the most-watched film in history. It is often ranks among the Top 10 Films in most critics’ & popular polls, it certainly is in mine.

The Wizard Of Oz has provided enduring quotes for our popular cultural consciousness. Its signature song, Over The Rainbow, as sung by Judy Garland, has been voted the greatest movie song of all time by the American Film Institute.

The film resonates profoundly for gay people. At the very least it brought us the term “Friend Of Dorothy”, codified slang for a gay guy that goes back to WW1. Plus, the screenplay by Noel Langley, Florence Ryerson, & Edgar Allan Woolf provided so many other catchphrases that have entered our lexicon:

Lions, & tigers, & bears! Oh, my!”, “Are you a good witch or a bad witch?”, “Toto, I’ve a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore.”, “I’ll get you, my pretty, & your little dog, too!” “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.” & “You have no power here! Begone, before somebody drops a house on you, too!

Do gay people identify with young Dorothy, or with young Garland in her most iconic role? Do we think of ourselves as the self-proclaimed sissy The Cowardly Lion, The Tin Man in need of a heart, or The Scarecrow the ultimate twink, or maybe even Toto?

If you are a gay person, you probably have spent a significant time in the closet, showing yourself to society as straight, before seeking the opportunity to be your true self. Most of us needed to escape the lonely, authoritarian, oppressive, heteronormative, black & white world of Uncle Henry & Auntie Em’s farm (our hometowns), & get over that rainbow to the Technicolor Land Of Oz where we could be free to perform song & dance numbers, encounter fantastical creatures, enjoy narcotic poppies, & experience excitement & transgression. We even chose the rainbow as our symbol of pride!

But it is also a terrifying journey, with a green-skinned Witch, & deviant freaky flying monkeys. Permissive Oz might even be a bad trip. Even a singing, dancing chorus of 3 foot people might be an analogy for doing too much coke in the Emerald City’s hottest club. On her return to the monochrome, but safe Kansas, Dorothy says:

“If I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than my own back yard.”

Much of the story was always confusing to me. What is so essentially evil about a wicked witch wanting those ruby slippers? Why, when water will kill her, does The Wicked Witch Of The West live in a place with a moat & leave buckets of water around? Residents of Oz are tough, Glinda The Good, played by Billie Burke, has no problem with murder & apparently neither does Dorothy.

All the witches seem rather lesbian to me. MGM cast Margaret Hamilton as The Wicked Witch Of The West, an actor with a history of spinster roles, when first choice Gale Sondergaard refused to play an ugly green witch. “Spinster” is often a Hollywood cover for lesbian. Obviously, Almira Gulch, without a husband, is a stand-in for a dyke. Glinda is single also, but she is pretty & her costume positively bridal. The Wicked Witch’s crime is that she’s unfuckable, & even that doesn’t hold her back. She is even sexually predatory to the femme Dorothy & stated:

“It’s so kind of you to want to visit me in my loneliness.”

It is all pretty gay to me. Even as a child I got that vibe.

Nothing about putting together the film version of The Wizard Of Oz came easily to producer Mervyn LeRoy & musical producer Arthur Freed. There were many rewrites. During filming, directors continued to add & cut scenes. Jack Haley & Bert Lahr wrote some of their own dialogue for the Tin Man & The Cowardly Lion. Because the screenwriters weren’t getting it, lyricist Yip Harburg (Harold Arlen wrote the music) wrote all the dialogue that setup the songs including the part where they give out the heart, the brains & the nerve. He was the final script editor giving the film some cohesiveness. Shirley Temple was originally attached to play Dorothy & W.C. Fields was tapped to play The Wizard. Ray Bolger was originally cast as The Tin Man & Buddy Ebsen (later famous as Jed Clampett on the 1960s TV series The Beverly Hillbillies) was to play The Scarecrow, but before filming commenced they convinced LeRoy to let them switch roles. 10 days in to filming, Ebsen had a severe reaction to the aluminum powder makeup he wore & it coated his lungs. Ebsen was hospitalized in critical condition & he was replaced by Jack Haley. MGM neglected to tell Haley about the makeup, he thought Ebsen had been fired.

The original director Norman Taurog was replaced by Richard Thorpe who was replaced by George Cukor who didn’t actually shoot any scenes, but took on artistic decisions & really set the tone for the film that we know. Cukor left to direct Gone With The Wind & Victor Fleming took over. Then Fleming left to take over Cukor’s work on Gone With The Wind & King Vidor became the 5th director of The Wizard Of Oz. Vidor shot the B&W Kansas scenes, including Garland’s singing of Over The Rainbow & the tornado.

Filming of the massive musical film was long, wild, difficult, & dangerous. Half of the cast was either injured or nearly died during filming. Producers had to find & screen test hundreds of little actors & MGM designer Adrian had to design over 100 costumes for the Munchkin sequences. Then he had to photograph & catalog each little actor in costume so that the clothing & makeup would have continuity each day of production. Margaret Hamilton was severely burned making her entrance in Munchkinland & spent 6 weeks in the hospital before returning to the set. The Flying Monkeys were nearly strangled by the wires used to keep them aloft.

For a month after the film opened on this day in 1939, Garland & her pal & MGM star Mickey Rooney would perform a live act for the audience, quite the deal for 25 cents (Toto also made more per week than most Americans did in the 1930s).

The Wizard Of Oz received enthusiastic reviews when opened, but it lost money in its initial release, it grossed about 3 million dollars (25 million was spent on advertising for the film’s re-release in 2013). It didn’t show a profit until it was re-released a decade later. Now it is recognized as a landmark achievement. It is also a bit of a mess, Dorothy’s hair changes lengths, props change or disappear, lighting necessary to shoot in Technicolor reflects back on the shiny sets.  But, as the mayor of Munchkinland announces to Dorothy:

 “From now on you’ll be history!”

An important film for queer people, The Wizard Of Oz should be seen by everyone on the planet at least once. Dorothy says it perfectly like this:

“Someplace where there isn’t any trouble? Do you suppose there is such a place, Toto? There must be. It’s not a place you can get to by a boat or a train; it’s far, far away, behind the moon, beyond the rain….”

The post #BornThisDay: The Wizard Of Oz appeared first on World of Wonder.


#WeekendEscape: 12 of the World’s Best Beaches You Have To See

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Northwest Harbor Beach
East Hampton, New York

Mid-August, just about anywhere is heavenly weather (unless you are my mother in Oklahoma, where the heat index last week was 112!) I was at the pool all day yesterday, but the beach is even better. Here are ten that Trip Advisor recommend and I can’t find any fault at all. Two of mine aren’t here. One is a bay beach I visited last week in the Hamptons, deserted on a weekend in August. The other is the clothing optional Kehena Black Sand Beach on the Big Island in Hawaii that I hope to get to again in my life. Enjoy it, BEACHES!

Kehena Black Sand Beach Big Island, Hawaii

Kehena Black Sand Beach
Big Island, Hawaii

Anse Lazio Praslin Island, Seychelles

Anse Lazio
Praslin Island, Seychelles

Navagio Beach (Shipwreck Beach) Zakynthos, Greece

Navagio Beach (Shipwreck Beach)
Zakynthos, Greece

Grace Bay Providenciales, Turks and Caicos

Grace Bay
Providenciales, Turks and Caicos

Lanikai Beach Hawaii, US

Lanikai Beach
Hawaii, US

Eagle Beach Aruba, Caribbean

Eagle Beach
Aruba, Caribbean

Bamboo Island Ko Phi Phi Don, Thailand

Bamboo Island
Ko Phi Phi Don, Thailand

Pink Sands Beach Bahamas, Caribbean

Pink Sands Beach
Bahamas, Caribbean

Whitehaven Beach Whitsunday Islands, Australia

Whitehaven Beach
Whitsunday Islands, Australia

Radhanagar Beach Havelock Island, India

Radhanagar Beach
Havelock Island, India

Siesta Key Public Beach Florida, US

Siesta Key Public Beach
Florida, US

The post #WeekendEscape: 12 of the World’s Best Beaches You Have To See appeared first on World of Wonder.

#WatchNow: How a Spaced-Out Miley Cyrus Got Dolphin Boobs & Rode Her Own Cat

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For the MTV Video Music Awards, artists Pamela Reed and Matthew Rader, made four video short promos. Reed told W magazine how she got Miley to ride her own cat, Shanti:

“She arrived and immediately hugged us. She’s outgoing and we pretty much just told her to ride this cat and cheered her on.

We took some photos of her cat on set and then we collaborated with a 3D modeler to get the exact face of the cat and its paws and fur. It was really important to Miley that the cat look like her cat, which is so cute. We love cats. We have five of our own and we’ve had it on our dream list for the past eight years for a model to ride a cat.”

The MTV VMAs are Sunday August 30. Watch.

MTV VMA 2015 Promo – YEEHAW from Pamela Reed + Matthew Rader on Vimeo.

MTV VMA 2015 Promo – SIDESCROLLER from Pamela Reed + Matthew Rader on Vimeo.

MTV VMA 2015 Promo – MAGICAL BREASTS from Pamela Reed + Matthew Rader on Vimeo.

MTV VMA 2015 Promo – SPACED OUT from Pamela Reed + Matthew Rader on Vimeo.

(via W magazine)

The post #WatchNow: How a Spaced-Out Miley Cyrus Got Dolphin Boobs & Rode Her Own Cat appeared first on World of Wonder.

#NoEscape: Donald Trump’s Hair Discovered in the Amazon!

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Donald Trump is EVERYWHERE. There is NO escape. On Twitter, on TV, on The Wow Report and apparently, even in the Amazon rain forest. Actually, this rare caterpillar only LOOKS like Trump’s hair. So, this Flannel Moth caterpillar (Megalopyge Opercularis) has been nicknamed the Donald Trump Caterpillar. It was shot by Phil Torres of Posada Amazonas Rainforest Expeditions while leading a photography tour in Peru. He posted the photo and immediately people began commenting. Torres told the Daily Mail;

“We didn’t see the resemblance when we first saw the caterpillar, but looking at the photo, it’s certainly similar to his hair. It was pretty funny, people went mad for the photo comparing it to his toupee.”

And just like the man himself, the Donald Trump Caterpillar can be very dangerous;

“If you touch that thing, it would seriously hurt. It has these little hairs that can poke into your skin and release a venom.”

Hmmm. Just like a certain venomous billionaire…? Rosie, got anything to say about this? (Photo, Phil Torres; via GrindTV)

The post #NoEscape: Donald Trump’s Hair Discovered in the Amazon! appeared first on World of Wonder.

#TrumpInsults!: Donald Came For World of Wonder – & He’s Coming For YOU Next!

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Yes, he came for us! POTUS candidate, Donald Trump threw some MAJOR shade at World of Wonder and some of the Wow Report bloggers! Was it because we gave out his office number? Or because the World of Wonder offices now has a dozen Trump pinatas hanging in their conference room? No, it because we made him. The Trump Generator creates an insulting Tweet from The Donald, directed at you or your friends. I’ve posted this a few times and am amazed that that some folks think it’s really from Trump. Go ahead, try it here. Tag @WorldOfWonder @realDonaldTrump

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The post #TrumpInsults!: Donald Came For World of Wonder – & He’s Coming For YOU Next! appeared first on World of Wonder.

#LGBT: Man Poses as Target on Facebook & BRILLIANTLY Trolls Haters of Its Gender-Neutral Labeling

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As, I always say,

“Never read the comments section.”

It’s a rule I really try to live by. Well, that rule is now shattered and I’ll tell you why. As you may have heard Target is moving toward gender-neutral labeling in their stores (Bravo! Brava!) but from the outcry you’d think they were selling shit-flavored ice cream in the guise of yummy chocolate. The giant retailer received a steady stream of nasty comments from people that were REALLY upset, so Mike Melgaard posed as Target on Facebook creating a fake account, Ask ForHelp, with a bull’s-eye profile pic. He got away with the GENIUS scam for about 16 hours, commenting on over 50 posts before “Ask For Help” was shut down.

Melgaard told AdFreak that he was just surfing Facebook on Sunday night when he noticed that Target was moving away from gender-based labels in both the toy and children’s bedding sections.

“Immediately, I knew there would be your typical outraged American spouting emotional reactions on their Facebook page. After taking a look, I was literally laughing out loud at my computer. A few more minutes in and it struck me how hilarious it would be to portray myself as a parody customer service rep. So, I did just that, and the rest was history. Honestly, it was like striking comedy gold. Every one of these people gave me the ammunition I needed for a great response.”

But Melgaard says his stunt was more about the comedy than taking a stance on the issue;

“I definitely side with Target and support their decision wholeheartedly. That being said, this was, for me, more about the laughs. I absolutely love satirical humor, and I think America could use a little more laughter.”

Here are a good two-thirds of those posts, which –besides taking a stand on an important issue– just might make for THE funniest thing you’ve read all week.

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(via Adweek)

The post #LGBT: Man Poses as Target on Facebook & BRILLIANTLY Trolls Haters of Its Gender-Neutral Labeling appeared first on World of Wonder.

#WTF!?: Proof There ARE Glitches in the Matrix (More Often Than You Might Think…)

WOW Report Featured Posts


Drool Over World of Wonder’s Weekly Island Report

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If you’ve been watching Island Hunters on HGTV, then YOU KNOW the jaw-droppingly sumptuous private islands that are out there on the market. Every week on our Island Report, we’re bringing you a hot new property you DIDN’T see on the show. It’s time to stop what you’re doing and salivate over this week’s gem: Ilha Pousadouro, in Brazil! Does it get any better than this? Probably not… check out the photos to see for yourself!

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More about isla Pousadour, via Private Islands Online:
Ilha Pousadouro is a stunning private island eco resort covered in coastal rain forest, with a fully developed “pousada” (an eco lodge with 21 individual chalets).

Guests at the lodge are attracted by the local fauna and flora. Depending on the season, activities include birdwatching, dolphin, penguin, and whale watching, orchids bloom, deep sea fishing.

Activities also include a variety of water sports, hiking on the island, beach lounging, boat rides along the coast and snorkelling. Ilha Pousadouro is also a fanatastic and well known venue for hosting weddings and honeymoons.

There is a world class restaurant on the island serving all kinds of exquisite seafood dishes and tropical drinks.

The 21 eco-chalets are comfortable and well equipped; all the chalets offer picturesque views of the Atlantic Ocean and many are fitted with balconies and a few with fireplaces.

The current owners’ have recovered and integrated the local vegetation since they bought the property in the early 70s before transforming the private island retreat into a fully functioning eco resort in 1992.

 

The post Drool Over World of Wonder’s Weekly Island Report appeared first on World of Wonder.

NYC’s Style Sexual Revolution Captured In “Gloss: The Work of Chris von Wangenheim” Book

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The scene boys of NYC who brought you Antonio Lopez: Fashion, Art, Sex, and Disco and The Stephen Sprouse Book, Roger Padilha and Mauricio Padilha (Mao PR), are back at it again, educating and enlightening all you queens on the history of style. Their latest homage GLOSS: The Work of Chris von Wangenheim, highlights the fashion photog’s images that documented the glamour and excess of the 70’s. Unlike most photographers, Wangenheim veered away from one distinctive style. His snaps for Vogue, Harper’s Bazaar, and Interview Magazine were as fragmented and rebellious as the subjects/friends he captured. You can still catch his influence in Tom Ford’s work at Gucci, to Alexander Wang’s Spring 2014 campaign, shot by Steven Klein (who also did the Foreword for GLOSS).

 

 

“Growing up, Roger and I would go through the pages of Vogue magazine…it was Vogue after Diana Vreeland and before Anna Wintour, so the images were very tame, very catalog-ish; but then, all of a sudden we would get to a page that would startle us, and it was always a Chris von Wangenheim photo,” says Mauricio. “He would shoot models being bitten by dogs, female models wrestling men in tuxedos, and Grace Jones wearing a ponytail while the rest of her head was shaved, straddling a leopard. We became obsessed with his photos.”

 

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Gloss: The Work of Chris von Wangenheim is due out officially on September 15 (pre-order Amazon), but you can get a signed copy at Bookmarc, 400 Bleecker St in NYC on September 10 and Bookmarc Paris,17 Place du Marché Saint-Honoré, on October 3.

The post NYC’s Style Sexual Revolution Captured In “Gloss: The Work of Chris von Wangenheim” Book appeared first on World of Wonder.

August 22: It’s YOUR Birthday, Bitch!

#BornThisDay: Writer, Dorothy Parker

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August 22, 1893Dorothy Parker:

“3 highballs & I am St. Francis of Assisi.”

As a screenwriter in Hollywood in the 1930s, Dorothy Parker irritated studio head Samuel Goldwyn with her stream of caustic remarks. Goldwyn complained:

 “Wisecracks, I told you there’s no money in wisecracks. People want a happy ending.”

Parker’s retort:

“I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions & billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.”

Long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I played a wonderful character named Banjo, inspired by Harpo Marx, in the terrific play The Man Who Came To Dinner based on a real life incident in the life of Algonquin Round Table regular Alexander Woollcott. The group took its name from its hangout, the Algonquin Hotel in the theatre district, & was also known as The Vicious Circle because of the number of cutting remarks made by its members with their sharp-tongued banter.

I usually over-research my character work as an actor & I was sent on an Algonquin Round Table jag that lasted for decades. I read everything I could about & by these interesting, talented & witty friends during one of NYC’s richest periods. I have books about or by Woollcott, Edna Ferber, Robert Benchley, Ira Gershwin, George S. Kauffman, Herbert Ross & S.J. Perelman, but Parker is the personality that engaged me the most. She was the sharpest of the sharp.

In the 1920s, Parker’s fame came from writing a weekly column titled The Constant Reader which contained observations, book reviews, poetry, & short fiction for a fledgling little magazine called The New Yorker. Her review of A. A. Milne‘s The House At Pooh Corner read:

“Tonstant Weader fwowed up.”

I believe I had read everything by Parker by the time I was 21. A selection of her reviews was published in 1970 as The Constant Reader, the title of her column. My copy traveled with me from Spokane to Boston to LA to Seattle to Portland. It is dog-eared & stained, but sitting smartly on the bookcase as I write this.

“If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.”

She married Alan Campbell in 1934. Campbell was a failed actor who hoped to become a screenwriter. Like Parker, he was half-Jewish, half-Scottish. Campbell was the second gay husband & she married him twice. Parker claimed in public that he was “queer as a billy goat“. The couple was under contract at Paramount Pictures, with Campbell making $250 per week & Parker earning $1,000 per week. They eventually were paid more than $20,000 a month as freelancers.

“I require 3 things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, & stupid.”

Parker & Campbell worked together on more than 15 films including the first A Star Is Born (1937), the one with Janet Gaynor & Fredric March, & Alfred Hitchcock’s Saboteur (1942). Her success during this period brought 2 Academy Award nominations, but her career as a screenwriter was thwarted by the Hollywood Blacklist after an investigation by The House Un-American Activities Committee (HUAC) because her involvement in left-wing politics. Parker was staunchly anti-fascist in the 1930s & was a strong advocate for liberal causes all if her life.

“You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.”

When I lived in NYC in the 1970s, my handsome, sexy, neurotic, born in NYC boyfriend treated me to a Dorothy Parker’s Manhattan Tour one autumn day, with stops at her girlhood home on the Upper West Side, the Algonquin Hotel, Alexander Woollcott’s home Wits End, the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel, the old offices of The New Yorker, & the restaurant- 21.

In an Algonquin Round Table game, when asked to use the word ‘horticulture” in a sentence, Parker quipped:

“You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.”

Parker led an interesting, but difficult life, with a troubled childhood, 3 marriages, & several suicide attempts, lots & lots of booze. Her caustic wit, talent, wisecracks & sharp eye for urban sophisticates & their foibles endures.

“Heterosexuality is not normal, it’s just common.”

Parker has been portrayed on film & on stage many times including by Dolores Sutto in Hollywood (1976), Rosemary Murphy in Julia (1977), Bebe Neuwirth in Dash & Lilly (1999) & most interestingly by Jennifer Jason Leigh in the terrific Mrs. Parker & The Vicious Circle (1994). Neuwirth was nominated for an Emmy Award for her performance & Leigh received a number of awards & nominations, including a Golden Globe nomination.

“Tell him I was too fucking busy… or vice versa.”

Parker was an early defender of human & civil rights. Her 1927 The New Yorker story Arrangement In Black & White deftly mocks people who claim not to be racist but act with incredible condescension & prejudice.

When Parker checked out for good in 1967, taken by a heart attack at the 73 years old, she left her entire estate to Martin Luther King, Jr. After King’s murder, the estate was passed to the NAACP. Her estate executor, playwright Lillian Hellman, bitterly, yet unsuccessfully, contested Parker’s wishes. Parker’s ashes remained unclaimed & knocked around various locations, including her lawyer’s filing cabinet, for 2 decades. She was finally placed beneath a brick circle at NAACP’s headquarters in Baltimore. Her epitaph reads:

“Excuse My Dust”

 

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#AndyHeist: “Marilyn” &“Soup Can” Works Stolen From Warhol Museum

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PAY-Missing-Andy-Warhol-paintings-2-e1440060907611Two works by Warhol have disappeared from the Andy Warhol Museum of Modern Art in Medzilaborce, Slovakia, after being loaned to Arts Group, for “educational purposes.” They are a Campbell’s Soup can painting (this must be a print too, because all of the soup can paintings are atMoMA) and a Marilyn print. They’ve been missing since March, but the museum has just made the incident public. Slovak police estimate that the artworks could fetch up to six figures in the market. (This makes no sense to me, as any Warhol painting is worth 7 figures plus…) Anyway, according to museum officials the institution had arranged similar loan agreements with the same company in the past. But after the firm had failed to return the artworks, the museum began to suspect that pieces may have been stolen. Michal Bycko, deputy manager of the museum said;

“The artworks which were loaned were collected by a security company with guns. They had all the relevant documents so there was no reason not to hand them over.”

Then it gets complicated. The Slovak Spectator (not making it up) reports that the missing works could have become ransom in a dispute between Martin Švajda, from Arts Group, and Herbert Gorge, an Israeli businessman. Gorge allegedly lent over $600,000 to Švajda to buy works from various artists, including Warhol. Some of these works were supposedly fakes and, as a result, Švajda got into debt.

Slovakian government officials said the loan agreement was not signed between the museum and Arts Group, but between the museum and an individual. Meanwhile, Valika Maďarová, the museum’s director, has been suspended on suspicion of being involved in the plot. Maďarová is NOT cooperating with investigators, making it difficult for police to assess the relevant evidence. Police also say that the Bratislava address in the loan agreement is deserted. The museum is only ten miles away from the birthplace of Warhol’s mother, Julia Warhola and contains over 160 works, memorabilia and artifacts. However this museum ended up in Slovakia, it is the second largest museum dedicated to Andy, outside The Warhol in Pittsburgh.

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(via ArtNews)

The post #AndyHeist: “Marilyn” & “Soup Can” Works Stolen From Warhol Museum appeared first on World of Wonder.

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